Thursday, January 01, 2009

What I Did on January 1, 2009

To get the New Year off to a tremendous start, I thought I would post my list of accomplishments for the day:

1. Slept in the recliner with the baby until 10:30 am

2. Did not get up from the recliner until 2:00 pm (that is some serious bladder control, my friends)

3. Ate Rice Krispie Treats for breakfast, at noon, with a Coca Cola chaser. We didn't have any Ding Dongs.

4. Watched not one, but TWO complete seasons of Reba. Oh that Barbara Jean makes me laugh so!

5. Ate Buffalo Garlic hot wings for lunch. Oh, and Honey Mustard ones too.

6. Didn't take a shower until 6:00 pm. I hadn't had one since last year!! (Wink! Wink! Oh, I do crack myself up sometimes)

7. Slathered my dry, cracked face with a vat of olive oil in some vain attempt to restore moisture to its old, wrinkly skin. But I'm not bitter.

8. Wiped Hope's snotty nose 1 or 357 times. With her pajama top. While she was wearing it.

9. Took all the ornaments off of the Christmas tree so Monk could remove it from my presence for the next 11 1/2 months. See, I was productive.

10. Made this list for you fine people.

I haven't actually thought of any resolutions yet. Obviously. Unless of course you count slouching around your house all day in your CLOTHES FROM YESTERDAY, watching old t.v. series reruns and eating junk food as resolutions.

If so, then I'm golden.

By the way, I have some very exciting news to share....but I'm afraid it'll have to wait until Monday. But because I'm such a giving person and I don't want y'all gettin' all up in my Kool-Aid about leavin' you hangin' again, then I'll give you a hint.

(And no, I am NOT pregnant again so don't any of you little sassy mouth friends or relatives of mine (you KNOW who you are) be leaving any smart remarks on my blog)

(Can one use parenthesis inside of parenthesis??? Did I just commit some sort of Grammatical Anathema by doing so??)'s the hint:

When they build it, it will come.

Teeheehee....I just love being all mysterious and vague. Makes me feel all Marlene Dietrich-ish.


The Burkes said...

Ahem, if you insist...

If you are using parenthesis inside of parenthesis, you are in the wrong my dear. Be ever so kind and refer back to your 10th grade English class that you love so much, could probably do as much as time traveling BACK to 5th grade you will learn that the correct use is:

[And no, I am NOT pregnant again so don't any of you little sassy mouth friends or relatives of mine (you KNOW who you are) be leaving any smart remarks on my blog]

your welcome.

oh and your totally ratting yourself out to your chiro and your midwife by self admission to these horrible acts of treachery committed to your body!

Anonymous said...

OUCH, I totally resemble that remark about the relatives. That one might have left a mark :-)



the one and only, elisa said...

It NEVER occurred to me for you to be pregnant again.....ok that was my first thought. BUT, its your own fault. Thats what it always is when you say "I have exciting news". Its true.
But considering your not pregnant and since I have been at your house this week I think i probably already know what IT is....

Christine said...

Are you sure that you aren't pregnant? (just kidding) Umm, I am guessing that your Aldi is going to be built soon. By the way, your day, yesterday sounded like a hoot. You have bladder control to be envied. ;)

Jill said...

Wow! I am impressed! Holding a baby, eating and drinking SODA (GASP!) AND not getting up until 2 p.m.! You are definitely not aging in the bladder department. Anyway, I am excited to hear your exciting news. I love excitment. If it is an ALDI, I am going to be a bit miffed, but still happy for you. I just wish there was one closer here!

Don't worry so much about telling us about your nasty junk-food binge. New Year comes but once a year, and I am SURE that is the ONLY time you EVER strayed this WHOLE year, right? Good thing you got it out of the way on the first day of the year! Now you can be good until next Jan. 1, right?