I love my children. I really do. But people, children are messy.
I do believe that most people are born sloppy by nature and have to be trained to be neat and tidy. Those that know me are now rolling on the floor laughing hysterically. Stop it! All of you! I am anything BUT neat and tidy. I like to say I'm creative. I am a work in progress. I am organizationally challenged.
The kids? Yeah, they're like me.
And Monk? He's more like Oscar Madison from The Odd Couple. So genetically, our children are doomed.
If I could change one thing about myself it would be my organizational skills. I long to be organized and neat. I yearn to not have paper piles that I incessantly have to go through looking for some piece of mail I've misplaced. I dream of never losing my wedding band and then finding it covered in dust in some lone spot, up high on the computer cabinet. After TWO years!
I've have really been trying hard as of late to train my girls to be neater. (I've given up on the 16 yo son. He just stinks. Period. He's cute, but he stinks. Or rather his room stinks. He just smells like a gallon of Axe on most days. To cover up his man stink.) I'm finding that when one unorganized person tries to teach little unorganized people how to be organized, it is pretty much futile. The blind leading the blind, if you may.
I've made many attempts at organization in the past, most of the time giving up within a few days. Mostly because around here, by the time you get one room neat and tidy the rest of the house looks like a tornado went through it.
But this time it's different. It HAS to be. You know why?
It's called...THE SIXTH CHILD, FOR CRYIN' OUT LOUD!!
Six children, two adults, a dog and two cats in a 4 bedroom, 1950 square foot house. Organization will have to be a must. Do you know why?
THE SIXTH CHILD, FOR CRYIN' OUT LOUD!! (There's a pattern here people, stay with me.)
No, really. The real reason is...
My own personal sanity. Noise doesn't bother me. Running through the house doesn't faze me. Viruses involving vomit are not pleasant, but I can deal with them. Children tying one another up is like water off a duck's back for me. But the clutter?
IT'S DRIVIN' ME CRAZY AND IT'S A SHORT DRIVE!!
Once again, I'm attempting to get organized and I'm going to use you people to keep me accountable. I've tried this before and failed miserably, but this time I have people that I know will stalk me and force accountability upon me whether I want it or not. You know who you are.
Plus, I'm on the fast train to morning sickness any day now and time is of the essence. So this week, my room to organize is....the little girl's bedroom (insert ominous music here). Have mercy!
So pray for me as I begin to conquer the likes of Polly Pocket and Barbie (the shameless hussy). Bitty Babies, Cabbage Patch and that wretched plush, called stuffed animals (may I just say that stuffed animals are an invention of the devil, himself).
I'm goin in and kickin' some baby doll bootie! I will prevail!
I will! I will! I will!